Vocations

Bishop stayed with us last week.  I had the opportunity to chat with him between sessions one morning.  I've been thinking about vocations versus careers lately, and asked him about discernment.

I've heard priests say they didn't set out to be priests, some even struggled against it, yet ultimately they gave in. In America today we tell our children to follow their hearts, pursue a career, do something they love.  We take aptitude tests to determine what career fields match our abilities, or what fields we would be happiest in.  My oldest daughter is preparing for college, deciding on a major and anticipating a career, so I am immersed in the world of modern discernment.


And "vocation" as we use it is never mentioned.

Catholics usually recognize the word as referring to the priesthood.  But every individual has a vocation: it means doing what God created you to do.  Priesthood or religious life is one vocation, but so is the married life, or the chaste single life.  A vocation can overlap with a specific career: my husband's vocation is to be a teacher as well as a father and husband.  He teaches chemistry now, but has always been teaching, even when he was trying very hard to be a doctor: God always placed him in situations with students needing instruction of one kind or another.

A vocation is difficult to discern because it is so contrary to our modern concept of self-actualization.  I've heard priests describe struggling with, even resisting, then finally surrendering to this thing.  A vocation seems often to be something un-desirable, perhaps even distasteful. And so I wondered how on earth does one recognize this thing, and come to accept it?

Fortunately God takes care of the first part.  He never stops, never gives up on us.  My husband did many things with moderate success, but once he decided to consider teaching doors were flung open before him.  So one part may be simply recognizing the unlikely opportunity and giving it consideration.

Very well, that helps identify the "career path" type of vocation: priesthood, teaching, nursing. Maybe even Captain of Industry.  But what then, if the vocation seems unpleasant or undesirable?  or simply too unfamiliar to make a rational or emotional evaluation?

I put that question to the Bishop, and he gave me a simple answer.  "I guess what it comes to is, what gives you a sense of peace." He remembered quite clearly when it came, after long effort and worry about his choice: he suddenly felt, simply, a profound sense of peace at the thought of being a priest.

Difficulties? Sorrows? Even simple aggravation? Yes, because those are part of every life.  But they are easier to accept when you know that you are doing what you are supposed to be doing.

I recognized an echo of what my mother-in-law had told me, a very wise saying, and I shared it with him.  She told me, "Marry the faults you can live with." And he laughed with me when I added, "of course she told me that after I was married!"